let them eat yellow cake.

US officials went on a secret mission to take away all 550 metric tons of yellow cake out of Iraq (it’s not so secret anymore). We took every single slice of delicious, moist, possibly frosting-covered yellow cake from a country that we’re most likely going to be renting for a while longer. Now what are our troops and maybe some civilians supposed to eat, Devil’s Food Cake? No way. Kirsten Dunst didn’t tell the French to eat Devil’s Food Cake. And what’s worse is that the Iraqis sold their baked goods to Canada for “tens of millions of dollars.” Canada. The only thing they’re known for is Ginger Ale and those guys who wear red jackets and ride horses. I’ve heard of outsourcing jobs to India, but outsourcing bakeries to Canadians is just ridiculous. Although this was Saddam Hussein’s secret horde of yellow cake, there’s nothing to be scared about; it’s just cake. Iraqi officials said that they were “worried the cache would reach insurgents or smugglers crossing to Iran.” I took a psychology class once, and I think they were just being paranoid. … Oh wait. There’s no space between “yellow” and “cake” in the article. Oh shit. The secret mission was to take out “yellowcake”, meaning Uranium, not “yellow cake”. Oops.

[Lola.]